Sex in Public

I have never had an interest in current affairs; celebrity affairs are much preferred. The Tiger Wood’s scandal was gossiping gold. Even when I was younger I would kick up a fuss when my dad tried to turn off Looney Tunes so that he could watch Sky News. I think my dislike stemmed from the stigma that the news only reports depressing incidents and political cases. Basically shit that only old people care about. However, the other day while browsing the BBC News website I stumbled across an article about the policing of sex in public.

 No matter how mature or sexually experienced you become, the second you see a post about sex you absolutely have to read it. You know what I’m talking about; all those times you’ve bought yourself a glossy new Cosmopolitan and turned straight to the ‘Love, Sex & Relationships’ section to discover which acrobatic positions give the best orgasms when in reality you’re just doing Fifty Shades of Missionary.

And so with that in mind I delved into the article ‘The Tricky Business of Policing Sex in Public’. I was then relatively shocked and surprised to see that it was mainly about gays getting arrested for bumming in cars in the 1960s. Personally I feel that the girl I witnessed on Saturday night getting finger blasted in McDonalds deserves to spend a night in the cells more so than any homosexual anal enthusiast. But hey, that’s just my opinion.

Vitamin C

As a perpetually fussy eater I would only ever eat strawberries, thereby neglecting all other contenders in the fruit bowl. Oranges in particular were never peeled, segmented or consumed. My aversion to oranges didn't stop at the fruit but continued to juice and even flavoured sweets. Orange became a concept I held much animosity for. I had a breakthrough in winter 2012 when I sought vitamin C as a cure for a recurring seasonal cold. Orange juice became my Lord and saviour and I drank it as if it were the elixir of life. I dreamt of swimming in rivers of orange and dancing with goldfish.